joie de vivre

12 for 2012

2012-01-04T00:03:00.001-08:00

As they always say, New Year is the time for new beginnings. For some, NewYear is also a perfect excuse to be sentimental (hehe) – to reevaluate the achievementsand failures in the past year and set goals for the present year. For me, 2012 is an auspicious time to havefresh perspectives and to develop myself. It will also be a time for biggerdreams and accomplishments. I have listed below 12 wishes (or dreams) that Ihope would not continue to be just wishes. On December 2012 (which I hope wouldnot be the month when the world ends), I’ll check if all of them came true. J

1. To conquer the 2012 FSO Exams – Well this one is a WISH, haha. I do not evenknow if I am already prepared for it. A lot of things impede me fromprogressing in my review, like my own will.But this is my dream. To pass the exam would mean cloud nine for me, and ofcourse, to serve the Filipino people can really be rewarding. But I know that Ihave to sacrifice a multitude of my leisure time to succeed in this endeavor,which signifies less time in front of the TV and more time reading books andnewspapers. I am even thinking of attending a review class in Ateneo, whichseems to be very helpful not only for the exam but also for my post-graduatedegree plans. I need something that will force me to study. God help me dothis. Aja!

2. To have my Master’s degree abroad – achieving this will be “the moment”, the “thisis it” of my academic life, the climax of my biopic. Enough said. haha

3. To have the house of our own – last new year’s eve, our family promised that2011 will be the last year we’re living in the place we have now and we’ll belooking for a larger place, enough to keep us dignified and relaxed. Since ourpresent place is very small and located in a not-so-good neighborhood, I planto really scout for houses that my budget (plus loans) can afford, somethingthat we can call a house of our own. I pray that this is the year that God willgrant us this lifelong wish.

4. To invest – I recently read articles on mutual funds and other types ofinvestment products. Luckily, I found a blog about facts on investing in thePhilippines, which is very much comprehensive. I would like to start investingas soon as possible, and I feel that 2012 is the right time.

5. To learn the piano or the violin – I once did a career exam at UP, whichyielded a quite surprising result. It said that I am suited at being a musicteacher. How can I be someone like that if I don’t know any musical instrument?I am not that good in singing too. So I decided that this year, I must fulfillthe exam’s destined career for me. hehe No, I would just learn an instrument.Of course, little by little, and who knows, maybe it is really my fate to be amusic teacher.

6. To have a photo published in a magazine or aperiodical – you are mistakenif you think I am vain enough to submit a photo of myself for massivepublishing. Recently, I am into taking photos (I don’t want to call itphotography since I am just starting and I just use a simple point-and-shootcamera) I only want to have a photo taken by me be published in some glossymagazine page or in a periodical of national circulation (e.g. “Picture Perfect”section of Manila Bulletin).

7. To have my written article be published – may it be Youngblood of PDI or Reader’sDigest. Haha But first, I will have to shed tears and blood to come up with apublication-worthy article.

8. To travel – enough of being afraid to explore new grounds. I should have somebackpack experience this year, be it within the country, asia or Europe, withfriends, family or with myself. Naks!

9. To read at least 30 books – be it fiction/non-fiction novels, self-helpbooks, political and economic books. I must be Ninoy Aquino-ish this year.

10. To lose at least 5 kilos – maybe I’ll hit the gym this year, orcontinue to have a weekly jog at UP or just minimize my food intake. I MUSTLOSE WEIGHT!

11. Be more generous, helpful and loving as aperson – sometimes, being agoody-goody can get someone into trouble, but I believe in “you sow what youreap” kind of mantra. Being a good person can also make someone beautiful, notonly on the inside, but also on the physical looks. I believe that being goodto other people can reflect on someone’s physical appearance. But more thanthat, it is the act of being good that sends feelings of contentment andhappiness.

12. Have a more personal relationship with God – lately, I only talk to Him when I need helpor when I thank Him for the blessings I have received. I should share more withhim and tell Him my daily thoughts and aspirations.

2012 please bear with me and be considerateenough so that I can accomplish all those mentioned above. J

Happy New Year! Good vibes for 2012!

2011-12-31T03:47:00.000-08:00

2011 was a very good year for me, indeed. A year of high hopes, shattered and fulfilled goals, shocking discoveries, and open windows of opportunity. 2012 will be a better, exciting year. It will be a year of major self-development and dreams-come-true. Gotta love 2012!

Cheers to the year ahead! :D

21 keys to a Happy Life

2011-11-16T23:08:00.001-08:00

1.Compliment three people everyday.
2.Watch a sunrise.
3.Be the first to say "Hello."
4.Live beneath your means.
5.Treat everyone as you want to be treated.
6.Never give up on anybody; miracles happen.
7.Forget the Jones’s.
8.Remember someone’s name.
9.Pray not for things, but for wisdom and courage.
10.Be tough-minded, but tender hearted.
11.Be kinder than you have to be.
12.Don’t forget that a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.
13.Keep your promises.
14.Learn to show cheerfulness even when you don’t feel it.
15.Remember that overnight success usually takes 15 years.
16.Leave everything better than you found it.
17.Remember that winners do what losers don’t want to do.
18.When you arrive at your job in the morning, let the first thing you say brighten everyone’s day.
19.Don’t rain on other people’s parades.
20.Don’t waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.
21.Keep some things to yourself and don’t promote havoc by backstabbing people you love.

-repost

Saturday hangout

2011-09-21T21:09:00.000-07:00

I have this certain affinity to UP. When I get to own an SLR camera, UP will be my first subject. But for now, I'll settle with my reliable Nokia X2 5MP camera. haha

AS walk in sepia

edited version of the photo above

scary!

The 'JuanMa' experience

2011-09-20T23:55:00.001-07:00

The thought meeting an international celebrity and being able to get near him and have a little chit-chat with him face-to-face, in the WORKPLACE, never occured to my mind. Thus, as soon as we knew that Juan Manuel "El Dinamita" Marquez would be paying a visit to our office in connection to the promotion of his fight with Manny Pacquiao, we (my colleagues and I) were thrilled. To tell the truth, our bosses were so preoccupied with the arrival of their famous fellow Mexican that they let the whole office floor be polished ahead of the scheduled date and went the extra mile ensuring the security and 'peaceful' stopover of the boxer.

A day before the visit, various tasks were given to us to guarantee that the privacy of the office would never be disturbed by any unwelcomed intruder. I was assigned to man the entrance to the office of the 'big boss' and was told that no other person can enter it aside from Marquez. I was very nervous that someone might get hysterical upon knowing that he could not enter the big boss' office even if he is part of the entourage. I also felt jittery that I might greet Marquez "Magandang umaga" instead of "Buenos dias".

The 'day' has come and we were suprised to find a GMA van parked outside the office building early in the morning. Upstairs, we were bombarded by calls from different radio stations and periodicals asking what time will the boxer arrive, which added to the tension that we were feeling. But the moment 'el dinamita' came inside the office, everyone of us waiting for him was so quiet as if a silencing potion was poured on us. The boxer went straight ahead to the big boss' office but before that he smiled at me and greeted me 'buenos dias'. I greeted him back and felt relieved after doing that. The feisty warrior is a gentle celebrity after all. He seemed to be very nice and welcoming when asked for autograph by his fellow Mexicans or by other people inside the office at that time. What a pity that I was not able to bring a camera. Nevertheless, the function was fine and we got to have a photo with him posted on the ESPN website.

I hope he and Pacquiao will have a great fight on November.

On writing

2011-09-08T01:19:00.000-07:00

What would you do with all that knowledge if you can't translate it on paper?

Writing has been a big dream for me, specifically writing for a certain magazine or periodical. However, in the 22 years of my life, I have never yet tried to submit a written piece of my mind to any journal or publication. I mused on contributing articles to principal newspapers in the country and daydreamed of seeing my name on the editorial box of a lifestyle magazine. The farthest my writing has gone to is the office's official newsletter.

When I was in college, I remember talking to one of my roommates about the joy of reading. I told her that I love to read and learn a lot of things and let those linger inside my mind and that I would be fine without sharing it to other people. I told her that I did not like to teach and share my knowledge since I know how hard a teaching profession can be. Likewise, I did not want to write, specially after recently suffering a dismal average I got from a creative writing class. My roommate retorted that all the knowledge I acquired shall go to waste if I intended to just store it inside my head and keep it to myself.

Today, as much as I would like to share it, I am having a hard time on organizing my thoughts to be able to share my opinion and supporting it with things I've learned or read in the past. Sometimes, I cannot believe that I am like this despite having a college diploma from a very reputable university. Is it the standard of education in this country or I am just underestimating myself?

Gameface

2011-06-09T22:40:00.000-07:00

Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. - Ben Franklin

What is happening now can be upsetting at first. It can be experienced as something that undemines your capacities, what you stand for in the present. You may have thought of resisting, fighting and asserting your right. However, after giving it much thought, weighing the explosive sentiments inside your head, you realize that everything that is going on, everything that seem to pose an obstacle to your progress as a person, is actually leading you to an ultimate goal, a goal that deep inside your heart, is being considered as something unattainable.

So don't fret. God is working on your chess game. Now, it's up to you to help yourself and complement and concretize that desire. It's up to you to ponder on how God wants you to "check" your opponent. A little disappointment will result into a huge success. The universe will conspire to heed the desire of your heart.

Another year for chances

2011-03-22T02:08:00.000-07:00

It's my 22nd birthday! Yey!

It's time to act maturely and enough of kiddie stuffs. Will that mean that I will have to say goodbye to Spongebob? hahahaha

But seriously, I believe that from now on, I should be more serious with life, not that I will laugh less or not to tell jokes, but to really pursue any goal that I have, with the utmost effort I can.

****

Lately, I thought that I was having what they call "quarter-life crisis", a phenomenon experienced by the twenty-ish people, who after university and after winning a satisfactory job, is confronted with some emotional difficulties. I've learned from Wikipedia that I am not alone and the quarter-life crisis is not uncommon in our age bracket.

****

Also, from now on, I hope to be more "showy" with my feelings and be grateful for all the blessings given to me. I believe that an attitude of gratitude will help me to be a happier person and the habit of truthfully showing my feelings to the people I love will make them happier, I hope. ;)

A fable of ''communistic pigs"

2011-03-16T01:27:00.000-07:00

I have heard of this novel, perhaps a couple of years ago, after knowing about the other George Orwell's classic "1984", through the hit show Big Brother. During that time, I would always try to find a way for the book 1984 to get into my hands. Books are luxury and it would be unwise to buy and just read it for one time. So I scouted the library, in the hopes of saving my pocket from unnecessary damage and adding one more bestsellers into my 'reading list'. However, I could not remember how or when did I give up my pursuance on 1984.

One day, I got to chance upon a second-hand, old copy of the book 'Animal Farm', another George Orwell. My father planned to sell it for only ten pesos. I could not allow that to happen. A classic story from a world-famous author, for only 10 pesos??? I sneakily hid it from my father's view, who usually judges his pricing based on the thickness and appearance of the book, not on how much it contributed to world literature.

At that moment, I know that I am holding one of the greatest satirical pieces of the last century, though I still did not know to whom it was referring to. Thus, I read it from cover to cover, including the preface and introduction.

When I started the novel itself, I found it very funny and somewhat so impossible. Animal farm tells the struggle of the barnyard animals to overthrow their farmer, Mr. Jones. The animals succeded and went on to run the whole Manor Farm. They were in euphoria and relished their freedom from the harsh treatment of the human beings. Firstly, they changed its name to Animal Farm, to emphasize that it is being run by animals and the animals themselves will benefit from their produce. To establish a better organization within the farm, they chose the pigs to be their leaders since they were the brightest among the barnyard animals in Animal Farm. In the end, the pigs became more powerful and the fundamental ideals of establishing the Animal Farm became more blurry, along with the freedom of the naive barnyard animals.

I can say that Animal Farm is very entertaining, both for adults and children alike. Though children may not be aware of the satirical-allegorical theme of the story, they might be delighted with the thought of talking animals and that they can communicate with human beings through words. Adults who are familiar with the story of the Soviet Union could identify that Orwell might be referring to Stalin's overthrowing of Leon Trotsky when he created the characters of the pigs Napoleon and Snowball. The depiction of Communism is done through the principle of 'Animalism', wherein their main ideal is that animals are all equal.

One remarkable part of the story is when the Animal Farm had a food shortage and their leader, Napoleon tried to hide it from the onlookers by filling the food bins with hays and topping it with 'real food'. I remember the documentary we watched in Econ 31 whehrein it mentioned the efforts of the Soviet Union to cover its poor situation.

Overall, in Animal Farm, Orwell attacked the weaknesses in us all. Some can identify with the donkey Benjamin who has been in the barnyard for a very long time. He could be imagined saying 'been there, done that'. However, he remained apathetic despite seeing the pigs' rise to power and the subsequent curtailment of their freedom.

'Animal Farm' is one of the best stories I've read so far. I recommend it to political science or social sciences students, likewise to history majors, who would like to see how people react during the Stalin era in Russia.

answer to a father

2011-01-31T00:26:00.001-08:00

Resolutions? "Why not Daily Resolve"?

2011-01-26T22:12:00.000-08:00

Browsing through my blog, I found this article I've written almost a year ago. Sadly, I have not lived up to all the resolutions I wrote before. The worse part, I don't remember writing themm and I have "violated" a majority.

January 2011 is in its final days. Remarkably, I did not make any New Year's resolution as I used to do for every year. One, it will make you feel frustrated after a year; two, I forget them most of the time. Instead, I would like to call them "Daily Resolve" (as advised by Mr. Francis J. Kong, columnist, The Philippine Star). That means, I would list a "New Year's Resolution" everyday. Tough task, eh? Maybe, but I strongly believe that it will save from the humiliating thought of being frustrated with myself and putting all my effort into just less than ten resolutions per year. Promise, I will not forget them. A post-it will bring a lot of help for this one!

Fortunately, I can proudly say that I achieved the last one on the list. And I plan to do it again throughout 2011!

UP Lantern Parade 2010

2011-01-13T00:17:00.001-08:00

UP Acad Oval

Dec. 17, 2010

I thought my efforts to come to this event would be wasted because I was not able to get a friend who can accompany me. Good thing my sister was there and it was her first time to see the annual UP Lantern Parade. Works from FA did not fail me. They really are the best. It was fun watching them parade. :)

The trials of today are stepping stones to a brighter tomorrow

2010-12-09T19:17:00.000-08:00

Shit happens.

That's the truth I realized outside school.

In the University, everything seem to be carefree, everything seem to be so fine. After school and after I started working, I came to discover the said cruel world. I came to see cruel people can be. I was so naive that I always believed in the goodness of the human beings' heart.

However, that belief failed me.

Nevertheless, I learned, and those in-your-face situations that showed me how mankind is and how much more effort should I give in to toughening up myself are, believe it or not, gifts from God. I see them as the little stones that God throws at me to serve as my guide towards the dream that He has for me. It's as if I am Gretel and He's the Hansel walking by my side while throwing stones to the ground so that I would not lose my way.

Amidst those difficulties and situations that my belief in the goodness of people failed me, I pray that the Lord give me a strong heart, that He make me more assertive in dealing with others and that hopefully, I will not lose this single string that maintains my urge to largely help the people of my country in the future.

****

Hay... For the moment, I can just conclude that writing and pouring out my true feelings can be a great stress reliever.

Happy weekend.

Fear

2010-11-11T15:49:00.000-08:00

Some fear can be good, it can put you into action. But it is not good when you are so afraid that it keeps you from doing anything. (Fight!)

A status post from my friend Renky. Perhaps these are the lines that I should always remember. It fits my current state of mind perfectly.

May the good Lord help me.

edited using photoscape

2010-09-21T00:19:00.000-07:00

Jazmine, Jhajha, me, Carol, Ate Beth and Karen

This photo was taken by Ms. Shaira Luna (the promil kid) during the celebration of the 200th Anniversary of the independence of Mexico, and was edited by yours truly using photoscape. I had a lot of fun in this event and was able to meet new people and see celebrities.

A lost generation

2010-09-20T01:03:00.000-07:00

I am part of a lost generation
and I refuse to believe that
I can change the world
I realize this may be a shock but
“Happiness comes from within.”
is a lie, and
“Money will make me happy.”
So in 30 years I will tell my children
they are not the most important thing in my life
My employer will know that
I have my priorities straight because
work
is more important than
family
I tell you this
Once upon a time
Families stayed together
but this will not be true in my era
This is a quick fix society
Experts tell me
30 years from now, I will be celebrating the 10th anniversary of my divorce
I do not concede that
I will live in a country of my own making
In the future
Environmental destruction will be the norm
No longer can it be said that
My peers and I care about this earth
It will be evident that
My generation is apathetic and lethargic
It is foolish to presume that
There is hope.
And all of this will come true unless we choose to reverse it .
- Jonathan Reed
Read it now from bottom to top.
Refuse to be part of a lost generation.

re-posted from Chevy's tumblr.

Another escapade with photoscape

2010-07-01T01:40:00.000-07:00

before

after

Was there any difference?

office photoshoot

2010-06-15T22:40:00.000-07:00

Here are the pictures during our photoshoot for the El Galeon de Acapulco News, a publication of the Embassy of Mexico in the Philippines. It can be accessed online through the following websites: elgaleon.weebly.com or the Embassy's website http://sre.gob.mx/filipinas/.
I have written some articles in that newsletter, but go figure! :)

photoscape escapade

2010-05-30T23:51:00.000-07:00

For those who are lazy enough to edit photos in Adobe Photoshop, you can use Photoscape. It's downloadable in the internet for FREE! :)

Above are some of the photos I edited and collated using Photoscape. :) I know it can be amateurish-looking. That's because I just discovered it and I use my spare time in the office to explore Photoscape so there's not much time to practice using the tool. But I hope to get better in it soon. :)

another doodle

2010-05-26T02:06:00.000-07:00

Another doodle to include in my collection.:)

poodles, noodles, doodles

2010-05-19T21:54:00.000-07:00

I once saw a book in a second-hand bookshop that contains doodles of the former presidents of USA compiled by this certain person (he/she must be formerly working in the White House), wherein I discovered that Ronald Raegan has a talent in drawing. I did not really read what the person who compiled it has to say on those doodles. I was just simply amazed that some really great people made some terrible drawings (hehe.>=D).

It's fascinating that some other people are interested in someone's doodles. Even if they don't have a crush on you, they are still intrigued by what you draw/write if there's a spare time or if you are bored. That's what fame and prestige can do. Or am I talking about psychologists eager to analyze a person through their doodles?

So, to facilitate the work of that certain person in compiling my doodles if ever I become rich and famous, here it is, posted in my blog. I hope it can help him/her so that she won't be rummaging through all my notebooks from elementary to college, my scratch papers in the office and at home.

Whoever you are, I have one message to you: Wake me up!
:P

binabalik-balikan

2010-05-18T17:40:00.000-07:00

Location: UP Diliman (obvious ba? hehe)

writings later

my living stuffed toy

2010-05-18T00:19:00.000-07:00

I present to you one of the cutest creatures on Earth, Moo!

how cute!

baby pa nito si Moo

a Moo collage

emoo

ako yun ah! :))

silang malilinis at walang kasalanan sa bayan

2010-04-29T00:18:00.000-07:00

Bakit ba hangang-hanga kayo kay Liza Maza at Satur Ocampo?
Ang katotohanan na pagpanig nila kay Villar ay maling-mali! Huwag mo sabihin na wala silang alam sa mga maling gawain ni Villar! Bulag ba sila? At halatang-halata na sya talaga ang "no-longer-secret'' candidate ni GMA.

Dati okay ang dalawang iyan sa'kin. Pero ngayon, pweh! Wala silang pinag-iba kay Loren Legarda, gumagamit ng ibang tao para sa sariling ambisyon.

Sige, magsama-sama kayong magagaling at nagmamahal sa bansa!
May araw din kayo!

Before guiltful pleasures take its toll

2010-04-28T22:50:00.000-07:00

I am guilty.
I am guilty of living an unhealthy lifestyle...as of now. And I don't like it, on its every aspect, mentally, physically etc. Thus, I prepared a "Dare yourself''' list to get back to who I was before.hehe

Go to sleep at 9pm (sharp) for one whole week. Even on Wednesday and Thursday when American Idol is being shown.
Read a book during weekends.
Work without sneaking into Facebook, Blogger, Gmail, etc.
Have at least 2 new spanish vocabularies per day.
Jog during weekends.
Work efficiently and rapidly.
Always monitor where my income is going.
Always consult God.

Hmm. Seems difficult, but I gotta do my best with these. Wish me luck!

For the graduates

2010-04-22T02:32:00.000-07:00

I made this post more than a year ago, just before I finish college. Though this post can be very old, I find it very timely. :)

"How do you see the process from where you are now to where you want to be? Because whatever you want to do, it's not only what you want to do, but how the practical way you see it coming about, if you were to write down the 10 steps, from where you are now to where you want to be."

- Margaret Thatcher

I got the quote while reading the transcript of a film we viewed in my Econ 31 class. It was from Margaret Thatcher, the former Prime Minister of Great Britain. She stated it while having a meeting and reaching out to Solidarity chair, Lech Walesa who wanted the workers be freed from the communist regime of Poland and create a free workers union during the 1980s.

I just found the quote enlightening and timely. Since I will be graduating this April (hopefully! *thesis pa*), I felt a need to look at where would I want to be 5 to 10 years from now and how will I be able to get into that "perfect destination."

I remember, back in my sophomore years, I already had in mind what will I do after I finish college. How will I get my dream job, the things I should do in order to attain that, etc. As graduation approaches, all those plans seem to blur before my eyes. I realized how imperfect the world is. Perhaps, that's how life ought to be, pulling off your plans even if you're surrounded by adversities.

Good luck to me!

Blogspot vs. Tumblr

2010-04-19T02:24:00.000-07:00

I am thinking of moving to tumblr. since I am not fond of putting long posts in my blog and it is really hard for me to maintain it.

It's been a year

2010-04-18T23:00:00.000-07:00

This is my page in our Kalatas 2009 yearbook (ugh! I don't like the font style used with the names). The write-up was written by Sherillyn Raga, of course, a very good friend of mine (that's why it's all positive.hahahah! peace She! I really appreciate it. :D)

I hope this would really get published. The problem with the printer comissioned by our yearbook council is still not solved. They make up excuses, which can really be tiring.

I do not know if I am in favor of the refund, because I still look forward to seeing the yearbook in hard copy.

I guess what we can do now is wait, cross our fingers and keep on bugging this student council on when can we have the yearbook. :(

"One good reason to start blogging again." - vanilla walking

2010-04-13T01:11:00.000-07:00

A good read. :)

^^

2010-02-03T00:01:00.000-08:00

self - portrait daw..hehehehehe

masyadong magaling ang scanner at nakikita na drawing siya sa isang scratch paper... :D

just a de-stresser. :)

2010-01-12T21:24:00.000-08:00

No te amo como si fueras rosa

No te amo como si fueras rosa de sal, topacio
o flecha de claveles que propagan el fuego:
te amo como se aman ciertas cosas oscuras,
secretamente, entre la sombra y el alma.

Te amo como la planta que no florece y lleva
dentro de sí, escondida, la luz de aquellas flores,
y gracias a tu amor vive oscuro en mi cuerpo
el apretado aroma que ascendió de la tierra.

Te amo sin saber como, ni cuándo, ni de donde,
te amo directamente sin problemas ni orgullo:
así te amo porque no sé amar de otra manera,

sino así de este modo en que no soy ni eres,
tan cerca que tu mano sobre mi pecho es mía,
tan cerca que se cierran tus ojos con mi sueño.

I don't love you as if you were a rose

I don ’t love you as if you were a rose of salt, topaz,
or arrow of carnations that propagate fire:
I love you as one loves certain obscure things,
secretly, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that doesn’t bloom but carries
the light of those flowers, hidden, within itself,
and thanks to your love the tight aroma that arose
from the earth lives dimly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or
from where
I love you directly without problems or pride:
I love you like this because I don’t know any other way
to love,

except in this form in which I am not nor are you,
so close that your hand upon my chest is mine,
so close that your eyes close with my dreams.

- Pablo Neruda

awwww...

recurring sickness

2009-11-27T11:13:00.000-08:00

Nitong nakaraang mga buwan, palagi na lang ako may sipon at ubo at madalas mabigat ang pakiramdam. Hindi naman ako ganito noong high school ako at college. Sa bahay, ako ang huling nadadapuan ng karamdaman. Mahilig kasi ako sa citrus fruits at madalas ako uminom ng vitamin C. Sa totoo lang, ginagawa ko talaga iyon para lumakas ako at hindi dapuan ng sakit. Ayaw ko kasi talaga ng pakiramdam ng may sakit. Ayaw ko ng nalilimitahan ako sa mga gusto ko at dapat kong gawin, kaya pinagbubuti ko ang pagpapalakas sa sarili ko. Pero ngayon, parang hindi ko na ata kakayanin. Ito ata ang bunga ng madalas na pagpupuyat at pagtratrabaho sa night shift. Pinipigilan din nito na makasama ako sa aking mga kaibigan. Hay...Ayaw ko na! +(

2009-11-19T10:30:00.000-08:00

Quote for the day:

"God places the heaviest burden on those who can carry its weight.”
--- Reggie White

I hope that this quote can explain what is happening to me right now. I am undergoing a really hard time and experience which test my patience, perseverance, determination, attitude and outlook in life. I know God is doing this not only for His purpose but also for my good. And I know that whatever my goals are or what my heart really wants will be blessed and granted by the Lord.

on books & reading

2009-10-28T11:18:00.000-07:00

Quote for the day:

"Being busy does not necessarily mean you are making progress. Take time to think about your goals in life. Is what you are doing contributing to reaching your goal? Think about it."

- from May's Facebook status message

The office pantry suddenly looked like a bookstore when I arrived this evening. There is a Scholastic book sale (which seems to be more appropriate in an elementary school lobby), which sells books ranging from Twilight to Pride & Prejudice.

I was thinking of buying Great Expectations by Charles Dickens or Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen, or rather the "second" book of Lois Lowry. However, our bookshelves suddenly flashed into my thoughts. I imagined those pocketbooks in our bookshelves shrieking and crying out to me, vying for my attention. They want me to finish them first before buying a new one.

Alice Through the Looking Glass: Hey, you have begun reading me but did not finish me! You're done with Alice in Wonderland but how about me?
Cane River: I was a gift to you by a friend two years ago. On my front cover, it tells you that I am an award-winning book so I am worth reading.
The Joy Luck Club: You have already checked out the reviews about me and asked your bookworm friends if I am a good book or not. They all gave a positive response. So what are you waiting for? Start reading me now!
Mary Shelley's Frankenstein: You were amazed by the movie right? Why not try the book? You know what people say, the book is better than the movie.
A Christmas Carol: Psst! Christmas is near, what a timely reading I sure am!
******
A former officemate once told me to go back to reading if I have time. He mentioned book titles that are really great and are worth reading. He read those when he was just in highschool.
Unfortunately, I have not read any of those he had mentioned. Why? Aside from lack of time, I was just oriented into reading novels when I wast in my last years in highschool, around 3rd year to fourth year. The Cleverest Person in the World by Norman Whitney, I think, was the first novel that I had read. It was really a fun read. Since then, I got into reading novels.
*******
I hope to have more time reading (or is it just a matter of time management?) & it would be an achievement if I could widen the range of my leisure reading materials and not just stick to famous novels, Reader's Digest and Sunday bulletin. And it would be terrific if I can read fast so I can read more books, moreover, a very retentive memory to remember all that I have read and the wonderful worlds where I was once in.

Love for a Child

2009-10-27T11:20:00.000-07:00

by Jason Mraz

There's a picture on my kitchen wall
Looks like Jesus and his friends involved
There's a party getting started in the yard
There's a couple getting steamy in the car parked in the drive
Was I too young to see this with my eyes?

By the pool last night, apparently
The chemicals weren't mixed properly
You hit your head and then forgot your name
And then you woke up at the bottom by the drain
And now your altitude and memory's a shame

What about taking this empty cup and filling it up
With a little bit more of innocence
I haven't had enough, it's probably because when you're young
It's okay to be easily ignored
I like to believe it was all about love for a child

And when the house was left in shambles
Who was there to handle all the broken bits of glass
Was it mom who put my dad out on his ass or the other way around
Well I'm far too old to care about that now

What about taking this empty cup and filling it up
With a little bit more of innocence
I haven't had enough, it's probably because when you're young
It's okay to be easily ignored
I'd like to believe it was all about love for a child

It's kinda nice to work the floor since the divorce
I've been enjoying both my Christmases and my birthday cakes
And taking drugs and making love at far too young an age
And they never check to see my grades
What a fool I'd be to start complaining now

What about taking this empty cup and filling it up
With a little bit more of innocence
I haven't had enough, it's probably because when you're young
It's okay to be easily ignored
I'd love to believe it's all about love for a child

It was all about love...

let go and let live

2009-10-20T06:49:00.000-07:00

Today, I learned a very important lesson. That is to let go and let live.

I used to be a control freak. I always want to have a control on things, and sadly but not frequently, on people. I always want to make sure that everything is alright and everything and everyone goes according to my plan. I hate anything unpredictable. I hate guessing what's next.

I do not know why I came up to be like that. Perhaps, that is one of the most common "first-born syndromes". It felt like the responsibility of keeping things smooth-sailing in the long-run is on me which might be a source of my early years-frustrations.

But just this afternoon, I learned to breathe and relax. I realized that I need to let people as they are (well, of course, not those Filipinos who contribute to the detriment of our country), the things important to them and should not be imposing on others. I need to care for what others may feel and treat everyone as fragile as they can be.

To be peaceful, it is a must to let others be in peace, just like letting a loved one who passed away not to worry about our feelings and accept that they are gone. To enjoy life, I must accept ambiguities and of course, other people's decisions for their OWN lives just like how they have accepted my decisions.

And for this, I express my gratitude to my youngest sister for making me realize what have I been missing in my life.

2009-09-28T13:30:00.000-07:00

An image of the devastation brought by the typhoon Ondoy. I got this photo from the site of the French daily Le Figaro. I extend my sincerest condolences to the families who lost their loved ones because of the typhoon. Putting oneself in their shoes, it can really be heartbreaking.

I remember when I was in first year highschool, it was the last day of October, we also experienced floods (take note: floods) in our place. We were living near a river and one day it rained so hard that the river reached the streets. The water was up to our necks. We barely saved our things.

Fortunately, we had a neighbor living in this large house with a second floor. We, together with our neighbors, stayed there, as far as my memory would allow me, for the rest of the night.

It was really a horrible experience. I remember being very sad because I was not able to save the stationery I collected since grade school. But looking back, we were still very fortunate because we were all safe and sound.

Mais voila! After two days after the first flood, we encountered another flood. But it doesn't compare to what the people experienced with Ondoy. People did not only lose properties but also the lives of their family and relatives. I hope in some way I can ease their pain.

The UP Checklist

2009-09-18T14:03:00.000-07:00

I MISSSS UP!
That's why if I have enough time, I make sure to drop by UP, even if it's just for jogging or just to see my former orgmates. And I'll make sure that if I finally have my own camera, it is UP that'll be my first object.:)
And to pay a tribute to my beloved alma mater, I answered a "survey" that can be all about my stay in the state U.

[ ] Worried about getting bullied by fratmen or getting killed in a riot.
[ ] Got bullied by fratmen or was killed in a riot.
[ ] Witnessed a riot.
[✔] Watched the Oblation Run.
[✔] Made friends with a teacher.

[ ] Was tricked as a freshman into attending a rally/prayer meeting.
[✔] Wore red or black on one of those wear red or wear black days.
[ ] Wore red on Valentine’s Day.
[ ] Wore black on Valentine's Day. --hindi naman ako ganun ka-bitter.haha!
[ ] Celebrated a birthday at Mang Jimmy's.
[ ] Learned UP Naming Mahal. -I'll memorize it sometime. Promise!
[ ] Was an RA (registration assistant) or SA.
[ ] Lied or begged to an RA for a slot in class.
[ ] Participated in a there's-only-one-more-slot

-are you-feeling-lucky?
[✔✔✔] Jogged around the campus. - naman! I am for healthy living and I love being around UP during early mornings.

[✔ ] Visited the Vargas Museum. - kahit wala pa ako sa UP, nakapunta na ako rito. Field trip namin nung 3rd year highschool.
[ ] Knew at least one xerox lady, manong, or technician by name.
[ ✔] Attended university level graduation. -I won't let that "once in a lifetime" opportunity escape me.:)
[ ] Got an activist for a teacher.
[ ] Watched a La Salle vs. Ateneo UAAP game. - wala ako care sa kanila...hahaha

[✔] Watched a UP vs. any school basketball game. on TV -op kors!
[ ] Studied in CASAA.
[✔] Studied in McDonald's or Jollibee Philcoa for one full night and bought just one regular-sized drink.
[ ] Studied along Katipunan.
[ ] Studied along Katipunan and affected the mannerisms of a stereotypical Atenean.

[ ] Watch a play that's not required for Comm III.
[✔ ] Went stargazing.- with ETC people in the middle of Sunken Garden. How I wanted a repeat!:)
[✔] Ate in Chocolate Kiss, Tea Room (in CHE) or Chateau Verde. -sa Chokiss pa lang.
[ ] Slept in the lib.
[ ] Struck up a conversation with a taong grasa.

[ ✔] Wrote to/for the Collegian. - yung sa mga text comments kapag me issues sa kule.hahaha, pero once lang, na-publish naman.=))
[✔ ] Seriously pondered about the identity/ies of the people described in Eksenang Peyups. - at feeling ko nahuhulaan ko ng tama.hahaha
[✔] Went to the chapel. - op kors! Every Sunday.
[ ] Got a pebble stuck in your shoe/slippers while walking in Sunken Garden.

[ ] Had a Voltes V for a teacher. - wala akong Math 17
[ ] Took a class under Joseph Palis. - who's that?
[ ] Lied to the transcript lady to get a transcript earlier than the standard 3 months.
[✔] Went to a Freshman-only concert. -yup, nung Freshie ako, malamang, with my Kalai friends.:)
[ ] Subsisted on just streetfood (fishballs, half footlongs, kwekwek, squidballs/rolls, mais, dirty ice cream) for a day.

[ ] Learned how to smoke.
[✔] Went on an out-of-town trip with blockmates or orgmates.
[ ] Fell in love.
[✔] Actually read the book you keep borrowing from the lib. - para sa thesis eh hahaha
[ ] Played cards during your free time.

[✔] Dressed in business attire. - pag me event sa org, thesis defense
[ ] Sumabit sa jeep.
[ ] Got sung to or sung to someone in class during Valentine's day.
[✔ ] Watched the Lantern Parade.
[✔] Helped out a total stranger.

[] Helped out a total stranger because he/she was hot.
[✔] Learned to stay awake for more than 24 or 48 hours straight.
[ ] Got bullied by fratmen and feeling cool wannabe people who were actually losers.
[✔] Took Monday and/or Sat classes.-nung Wed. pa yung free day, I took Table Tennis scheduled on Wednesdays.
[ ] Volunteered for the pahinungod.

[ ] Ate "tasteless white sauce" pasta from cock-a-noodle-doo. -Saan yun?
[ ] Got a boyfriend/girlfriend.
[ ] Got held up or pickpocketed.
[✔ ] Felt depressed because you were not as good academically as you were in high school.
[✔] Did a last minute paper. -sa thesis draft.haha

[ ] Had spent a lot for 1x1 ID pictures.
[✔] Got exempted from final exams.
[ ] Got exempted from a final exam but still took it.
[✔ ] Attended a varsity pep rally.
[ ] Watched LIVE AIDS, Androgyny, Maskipaps or any well-known variety show.
[ ] Promised to quit smoking.
[✔] Got into at least one (org- or council-sponsored) adventure race. --EURACE
[✔] Knew where the best restrooms are on campus. - Econ restroom.hehe
[✔] Joined an org.
[✔] Allowed yourself to make mistakes. -ayy, hindi lang ako once nagkamali.

[ ] Went to the gym in spite of having no PE class just to ogle varsity players/cute boys/hot girls.
[✔] Took summer classes. -EEEEVVVEEEERRRY SUMMER
[✔] Admired the Oblation.
[✔] Made a video for a project. -STS and French 140
[✔] Had a crush on a teacher. - haha. Si Prof Bamboo ng Bio Dept.

[ ] Had a teacher who had a crush on/tried to court you.
[ ] Attended your ROTC Bivouac.
[ ] Faked sickness to get an absence excused.
[ ] Got your car scratched by one of those "Kuya bantayan ko kotse niyo".
[ ] Took a PE class where you had to pay for tuition.

[✔] Went to school in your crappiest yet most comfy clothes.- at dahil diyan, inaaway ako ni Sir Baizas.
[✔] Learned how to use the Bayantel pay phones.-for Marketing at para magtawag ng speakers sa talks
[✔] Participated in school activities.-UP Fair (?) at USC Elections
[ ] Caught the UP Pep Tryouts.

[ ] Dated someone from UP.
[✔] Rode an IKOT and TOKI.
[✔] Found a tambayan.
[ ] Went drinking at Sarah's.
[ ] Learned how to beg for a higher grade.

[✔] Used your 6 allowable absences wisely.
[✔] Lived in a dorm.-during my whole stay in UP
[ ] Volunteered to be beadle or go-to guy for your group.
[✔ ] Had the worst schedule. - during my last sem in UP. Got a class from 5:30pm-7pm
[ ] Realized that there really is just one coconut tree on the sunken garden.

[ ✔] Not used up all 6 allowable absences.
[ ] Ate in ISSI, Treehouse, Mama Thai's and other more obscure cafeterias.
[✔] Ate food Aristocart-style.
[✔] Is active in your org/s.
[✔] Attended an ACLE.

[✔] Got as many app forms as you can during the job fair.
[✔] Learned how to cram.
[✔] Sold tickets for (or watched) an org-sponsored movie premiere.
[✔] Saved money to photocopy all of your seatmate's notes.
[] Had accidentally seen a make-out session.

[✔] Slept in class.
[✔] Finished a homework/assignment/paper in the Shopping center or Philcoa.
[ ] Had mountains of "unused" sample exams and/or old testaments.
[✔ ] Resolved to be "better this semester".
[ ] Slept during a test.

[✔] Had groupmates from hell.
[✔] Learned how to work with groupmates from hell.
[ ] Perfected the art of parking on campus.
[ ] Had a bad encounter with one of the guards on campus.
[ ] Developed a love for sisig even before UP.

[✔] Practiced those UP cheers in the first meeting for PE class.
[ ] Looked at microfilms in the library or poked through archives.
[✔] Reserved a classroom, AVR, etc. for a class or org function.
[✔] Attended the UP Fair.
[✔] Went to a library other than your own college's to research
[✔] Lost a perfectly functioning umbrella.
[✔] Used consultation hours properly.
[✔] Went to the Guidance Office for real, heart-to-heart guidance.
[✔] Went to the infirmary.
[ ] Attended class with a hangover.
[ ] Drink beer or alcohol while inside UP grounds.

[✔] Walked all the way to Philcoa or Katipunan from UP.-can't forget that!
[ ] Buy frogs from NSRI or a Bio department.
[ ] Maxed out on the 6 allowed unexcused absences but DID NOT drop.
[ ] Got invited or pursued by a sorority or fraternity.
[✔] Wore slippers to school.
[ ] Had a professor who smoked in class.
[ ] Got diagnosed by the Infirmary as pregnant or infected with STD.

"almost two weeks" notice

2009-09-17T11:51:00.000-07:00

Ako ay nagbalik...hahahaha

Matagal-tagal din ako hindi nakapag-post dito. Muntik na umabot sa dalawang linggo. Pero sa loob ng maraming araw na yon, ano bang ginawa ko? Hmmm... Bukod sa busy-busyhan sa trabaho, nagbasa-basa rin ako ng blog ng ibang tao, gaya ng blog ni Jim Paredes, Jessica Zafra, ng aking kaibigan na si Chevy at RC at ng isang Spanish expat (?) na si Manolo Perez. Nakakalungkot lang dahil naka-block na ata dito sa office yung site ni Jim Paredes. Magaganda pa naman at masarap basahin ang mga post niya dun kahit na nabasa ko na sa The Philippine Star.
Pero ngayon naaliw ako sa official blog ni Jessica Zafra. Ang dami na kasi niyang post at followers. Nakakaaliw.=)
Sana kasing-galing niya ako magsulat at kasing-ganda ng blog niya yung akin.

**************

2009-09-03T14:14:00.000-07:00

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”

reporter's block

2009-09-02T13:07:00.000-07:00

If there's what we call writer's block, then for me, there is "reporter's block."

[Topic! Topic! I need a topic!]

My French class requires each one of us to present a topic in front of the class, any topic that we would like to speak about. Of course, there are conditions: 1). the topic should interest us, 2). it should interest the listeners.

The second condition is the thing that occupies most of my mind for the past days.

What topic would interest two Filipino senior citizens, one Spanish lady in her early twenties, 2 Americans in their mid-twenties, and a French professor in his 30s?

The first topic that occupied my mind is the story of Anne Frank. Maybe because I was just fresh from watching La Vita e Bella which tells of the Nazi occupation in Italy. But I doubt that I know more about it than my listeners, since the majority seem to be older than me. Of course, they know a lot about it [history books, movies, reads].

And then the second one is "Blogs as a literature." But I'm an amateur in the world of blogging so I may not know much about it and I haven't tried blog-hopping. Moreover, I think I have to have a position in that topic and it will be hard for me to defend that in French.
[Ooops... I forgot to tell that we'll be reporting the topic in French.]

Next is Sudoku, but I'm not good at playing it, therefore I might not sound credible.

Then the next one is talking about platypuses. I found those animals interesting and weird so it must be fun to talk about it. But then again, it's weird to talk about platypuses! They might give me an odd look. And if I talk about it, the words that describe it in French are really hard to pronounce. But I want to talk about it but it's really weird.

I'm searching for a topic that would engage the people in those age groups and topic that would stimulate thinking.

AHHHHH!!!

Goodluck to me on Saturday.

2009-09-01T13:25:00.000-07:00

Ilan pa sa ginawa ko gamit ang MS Paint.

2009-08-31T12:56:00.000-07:00

Eto ang artworks sa MS Paint ng isang taong frustrated maging graphic artist at sabik na sa Adobe Photoshop.
Sobrang masaya talaga ako kapag ako'y nag-dodrowing, gumagawa ng poster sa Photoshop, nagpipinta ng kung anu-ano sa MS Paint. Eto na ata ang future ko.hahaha
Sa totoo lang, gusto ko talaga kumuha ng course on Multimedia Arts o kaya naman mag-apply dun sa mga maliliit na shops na gumagawa ng mga banner kapag birthday party ng mga bata o kaya yung tiga-gawa ng souvenir designs sa binyag, kasal etc. Ang chaka kasi nung mga nakikita ko..hahahaha [ang salbahe ko]
Kaya nga lang, kulang sa time at sa pera. Ah bahala na, sabi nga nila, "Kung gusto, may paraan, kung ayaw, may dahilan." In the meantime, pagbubutihin ko na muna ang MS Paint skills ko.

For the common good

2009-08-27T08:09:00.000-07:00

Are we worthy of our heroes?

08/21/09

By Senator Richard Gordon

The question remains, are we worthy? In this day and age, in spite of all the martyrdom of many of our heroes, it would appear that we have not learned our lessons.

Corruption is still upon us; our military die and rebels die in war; there seems to be untrammeled assassinations in our country; motorcycle assassins abound; many mayors, many journalists, many politicians have been killed; apparently, we all know how to talk about the problem but we can’t seem to fix it.

My own father was assassinated and there was never any closure, neither was there any closure on Senator Ninoy Aquino’s assassination. Up to now, we can only suspect who actually had him assassinated. The essential matters, the sense of it all—justice—we have not been able to secure.

We need to have an attitude change in this country once and for all. That attitude has to come out from the fact that we have to learn our history, the fight upon which all our martyrs, including Sen. Aquino, had died for.

We have to start thinking of the common good. We have to think of the national interest. Even if we stumble and fall, we should rise together as a nation and learn from our mistakes. Maybe then can we prove ourselves worthy of all these sacrifices.

Today, we can see how the media and popular culture bombard us with advertisements and obligations that begin with the "self." Seems like everything can be solved if a person do a little act of kindness. One can notice that in the "Ako Mismo" publicity ad and the TV Patrol campaigns. But in my opinion, those kinds of ads only breed the "I've done my part attitude" wherein one person is becoming inattentive of what others do as long as he has contributed something from his own. It doesn't perpetuate "collective action" which I still believe can do a lot.

I do agree with Sen. Gordon's article, we really have to think for the common good as of the moment where our country is on the verge of a fall. And we have to know our history! In one article, I've read that both Jose Rizal and Ninoy Aquino went back to the Philippines to try to stop extremist acts because it is said that the country and the Filipinos are not yet ready for a revolution. But why? I think it is worth knowing the reason and that can be done thru knowing our history. Yes, that can be taxing but its better than endlessly rant about our government.

Hay... There's a lot to do.

????

2009-08-26T12:53:00.000-07:00

At anu ang nangyayari, hindi na ako makapag-post?
Hindi.
Nakakapag-post pa rin ako, pero may mali daw dun sa pino-post ko kanina? Anu ba yun?
At ano ang problema ng Blogger? Akala ko pa naman I found the right one.
Ayaw ko pa naman nung mga naglolokong bagay. Bagay lang sila, hindi tao kaya wala silang karapatang magloko.
Hmpt!
Ma-try na nga lang ulit.
Sayang, kung kailan ako ganado mag-post, dun naman ako pinipigilan.
Hay...

If it kills me

2009-08-25T14:33:00.000-07:00

Hello, tell me you know
Yeah, you figured me out
Something gave it away
And it would be such a beautiful moment
To see the look on your face
To know that I know that you know now

And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking
You know nothing
Cause you and I
Why, we go carrying on for hours, on and
We get along much better
Than you and your girlfriend

Well all I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me

Well how long, can I go on like this,
Wishing to kiss you,
Before I rightly explode?
This double life I lead isn't healthy for me
In fact it makes me nervous
If I get caught I could be risking it all

Baby there's a lot that I miss
In case I'm wrong

Well all I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me

If I should be so bold
I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hand
Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man
But I never said I would
I guess I'm gonna miss my chance again

All I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me
If it kills me
I think it might kill me

And all I really want from you is to feel me
It's a feeling inside that keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me
If it kills me
It might kill me

blackboard punishment

2009-08-19T14:09:00.000-07:00

I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip.I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip. I will not gossip.
I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone. I will not have any prejudice on anyone.
Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day. Today is a good day.
I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries. I will have no worries.

* Ctrl + C and Ctrl + V were not used

A new blog?

2009-08-17T13:13:00.000-07:00

I have yet created again another blog site. And I'm asking myself why. I already have one in LJ. And of course it is automatic in Multiply. But why do I insist myself in this virtual world? Perhaps, I am still trying to supress my inner frustrations of being a writer.